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Guest Post over at Foodies are Fun!

Dearest readers:  I was asked to do my very first guest post!  Heidi, over are Foodies Are Fun, is putting together a series she is going to call “Foodie Follies.”  This series is going to feature the hilarious stories we all encounter in the kitchen and that only a few of us share with the world (despite the embarrassment).  Please head over to her place to read about my disastrous attempt at mama’s tortilla Española!

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Hello Foodies Are Fun readers!  My name is Rocío and I blog over at Apicius’ Apprentice  about learning my way around the kitchen.  I am no stranger to cooking catastrophes, so when Heidi asked me if I had a story I could share, I immediately thought: “hmmmm… which one?”

To give you a sense of my cooking abilities, my first attempt in the kitchen involved a packet of Pillsbury Chocolate Chip Muffins.  It was one of those just-add-an-egg and milk kinds of packets.  I set out to make an afternoon treat for the family but when I pulled the muffin pan out of the oven, I could tell something went terribly wrong.  The muffins had not risen, they were very dark (close to burnt), and were like little rocks.  It turned out I had forgotten to add the milk… yeah… one of only two ingredients I had to remember… genius, no?  I was in eighth grade at the time, but it pretty much set the tone for this culinary adventure I have been on ever since.

Before I get to this week’s incident, allow me to set the scene for you.  Read more…

 

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Maybe I just don’t like shortbread…

Months ago, I came across this recipe on Smitten Kitchen’s recipe list.  The description of the cookie was an “espresso-chocolate shortbread cookie” so instantly, my interest was peaked.  Having never attempted a shortbread recipe before, I was cautiously hopeful about how this would turn out.  I followed each step carefully according to the instructions.

After combining all of the ingredients, I spooned the batter into the plastic bag and rolled it according to the recipe.  I went through all of the prep work and placed the bag in the fridge to cool over night.  This afternoon, I pulled the batter out and cut it into the squares, pricked the squares with a fork, and put them into the oven.  Once they finished cooling, I bit into a square ready to be amazed.

But I wasn’t.  In fact, I was put off…

Both the texture of the cookie and the flavor were completely unappealing.  Sure, these little guys were cute, but ew!  I couldn’t stomach to finish even one of these.  In reviewing the footage of the game, three things came to mind that I could blame for yet another baking fail. First, maybe I messed something up.  Second, maybe the recipe was off.  And third, maybe I just don’t like shortbread.

I’m going to bet on it either being the first or last option… but who knows.  Needless to say, I won’t be trying another shortbread recipe for a while!

Spicy Vegetable Blah-ness

I strongly dislike starting December with a mediocre recipe.  I’m a sucker for soup, but something about this didn’t appeal to me.

The combination of spices sounded interesting (cumin seeds and chili flakes), and it even called for fresh ginger!  But somewhere between the blended sweet potatoes and chickpeas, and the added spinach, it fell flat.  Luckily, I made cornbread muffins to go with the soup, and they salvaged the meal.  The soup didn’t taste as bland with the crumbled muffins in it 🙂

Lame as this post (and soup) has been, there are exciting things on the horizon!  Two of my friends have agreed to let me showcase their favorite recipe on Feature Friday!  I’m also hoping to get a step-by-step “how to” from mom on her delicious spanish tortilla.  It’s all very exciting and I look forward to sharing it with you!

Here’s to December, and to the end of 2010!

Teriyaki Pork? or Teriyaki Leather?

Dear Food Blogosphere,

What am I doing wrong?  Have I offended the Apicius’ memory?  I feel like the last two days have been riddled with rookie mistakes, but I don’t know what they are.  First, there was yesterday’s chicken.  Then, there was today’s excuse for teriyaki pork.  I love crock pots and meat recipes, so what happened?

I found a recipe in my “Fix-it and Forget-it” cook book for teriyaki pork that looked promising.  7 hours later, the result was a tough pork chop that was almost completely flavorless.  I couldn’t even finish it.  Luckily, the dog loved eating my leftovers!  The only saving grace of this meal was the green beans recipe that I served with the pork (pictured in the back of the center photo).  I’ll post that recipe tomorrow.  It deserves its own post and feature cause I’m not going to lie, it was kind of awesome.

Anyhow, I hope you all are doing well.  If you have any ideas or tips on why this flopped, please let me know!  Please?

Love,

~Rocio

(a.k.a. Apicius’ lousy Apprentice)

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